Motivation Is A Bad Partner To Reach Your Goals

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I have recently seen the following tweet from a guy called Josh Viner:

As it says, his photo shows an empty gym in the morning that was full for the first two weeks of this year - thanks to the cringe virus of New Year's Resolutions.

However, as I already mentioned in one of my previous posts about this topic and year planning, New Year's Resolutions do fail in the first two weeks.

Why does it happen? In that previous newsletter issue, I wrote the following:

They lose their patience pretty quick because they mostly rely on their motivation to do things they need to do.

But motivation is quite a bitch.

Relying solely on motivation is risky as it can be unpredictable and fluctuate over time. Also, it may not be enough to overcome obstacles or sustain efforts toward achieving your goal over a long period of time.

To stay with the fitness example, on the first days of the new year, you might be motivated to get in shape as you imagine yourself with that killer body and how confident you will feel.

However, when you hit the gym for the 5th-6th time, getting exhausted from your workouts but seeing no results, your imagination about your potential killer body and confidence will be faded from your exhaustion and the lack of immediate results.

Because we are also addicted to instant gratification, and therefore, we tend to give up on activities or get bored of those if we see no gratification as quickly as getting that satisfying feeling from social media or other trashy consumption.

Success doesn't happen overnight. But our motivation is not usually aware of it, as in our head, we are already at the stage of success.

This is a crucial mistake I also used to make a couple of times in the past.

I gave up quickly on my fitness goals as I wasn't getting into shape that quickly after a few weeks.

I ditched my online travel news site as "I didn't have time" to work more on it, and it didn't seem to bring the desired results.

But now, looking back to these (and some other) mistakes, it's clear what went wrong.

I did lack the thinking in habits and personal systems.

Motivation might help you to start your journey. But proper habits and systems you create and follow will help you to stay on your path.

The Power of Habits To Stay On Track

Just like if you go on a road trip with your friends. You are all excited and motivated to make it to your destination, but as the journey continues, you start to hit roadblocks.

You encounter bad weather, standstill traffic, and unexpected detours that slow you down. Your motivation starts to wane, and the journey becomes more difficult.

But you have a plan; you set a schedule and made it a habit to follow. So, despite losing motivation, you are still progressing toward your destination because you have established a routine and set of habits that keep you moving forward.

Now imagine that you are on the same road trip but with no plan or schedule - just following your motivation. You stop for ice cream when you feel like it, you sleep when you are tired, and you take detours when you feel like it.

But after a few days, you realize you are not making as much progress as you hoped. You are getting lost, running out of time and money, and your motivation starts to wane.

Habits are like a map and a compass that guide you toward your destination, even when the road is bumpy, and the weather is terrible. And just like a muscle, the more you use it, the stronger it becomes, making it easier to overcome obstacles and setbacks.

Habits are like the GPS of achieving your goals.

How Should You Stay On Track?

1) Accept & Enjoy The Progress

Whatever goal you have, you must understand that it won't take overnight success to achieve that.

(Unless you are some lucky bastard who got rich from a meme stock or shitcoin by coincidence. But then, you will lose it anyways. It's not cynicism; it's the sad truth. Just read my article or watch this Netflix documentary.)

In fact, the progress might take longer than you expect. Or at least, it's best to accept this, put in the work, build habits and then let the compounding effects help you on the way.

Just like the previous analogy about the road trip - something we (mostly) do for the journey and the experience, rather than the destination solely.

Working on your goals is the absolute same. Getting into shape should be (mostly) fun and enjoyable - of course, those tough and exhausting workouts are not always fun, but the feeling afterward is rewarding.

There will also be days when your performance of working on your goal might not be as satisfying as you would want. That does not matter. What matters is the daily win of putting in the work, no matter how big or small it is.

A shitty workout is always better than no workout.

Poor writing is always better than no writing at all.

2) Start Small And Build Gradually

If you just start running, doing a 10K at first might not be the best idea. It's a shitty idea. Your body is not used to such a load; you will get more exhausted than you should be, and eventually, you won't keep up with running.

Instead, you should start with your first kilometer (or your first 3K) and ensure that you make this small habit regularly but at least a few times a week.

Eventually, you will realize that going for a run is not a "painful" thing anymore and that you endure more than initially.

Starting small and building gradually is like going on a treasure hunt.

At first, you might only have a small map with a few clues, but as you follow each clue and find each treasure, you get a better sense of where you're going and what you're looking for.

Eventually, you'll have a complete map and all the treasures you need to reach your goal.

Like a treasure hunt, starting small and building gradually helps you explore and learn what works for you and what doesn't. You'll be able to adjust your plan and make progress without getting overwhelmed.

Plus, it's more fun to find a treasure little by little than get everything at once, right?

3) Stay Accountable

We often give up on our goals because we have no accountability - even towards ourselves, meaning that we basically don't respect ourselves enough to stay accountable for our own sake.

If we cannot rely on self-accountability, the easiest way to ensure that we are are on track with our habits is to find an accountability partner. It can be a friend, love partner or family member.

With such an accountability partner, you should set up regular check-ins (weekly or biweekly), where you can share your progress, celebrate your wins or chat about the challenges and issues you might face on your journey.

You can also make a game out of it and come up with a reward system for when you hit milestones or achieve your goals, like a celebratory dinner, a relaxing wellness, or any other fun activity you both enjoy.

However, it is also essential that, eventually, you become accountable to yourself as well.

When I started this newsletter in the summer, I promised myself that I publish one issue every week, and I did whatever I could to keep this promise.

Of course, during these past six months, there were a few occasions when this didn't happen (mainly due to illness). However, I know I don't want to disrespect myself and that I skip a week if there's no solid reason to do so.

And despite my number of subscribers, I also feel the need to be accountable to you all. Even if it's only one person or a hundred, I know you expect to find a new article in your inbox every Wednesday.

And this knowledge empowers me enough to know that I want to deliver - no matter what happens.

Think about your goals & journey and what actions you need to take daily. Are you working on them? Do you deliver that work regularly? Or do you often skip that and therefore disappoint yourself and perhaps others?

If so, it's time to change it! Because motivation won't take you to the finish line. Habits will.

Máté - The Mindful Guerilla

💡 My Weekly Recommendations 💡

Stuff I Recommend You This Week

• My great friend, Juli, had a fascinating TEDx presentation on why the stuff we buy doesn't usually have a price that truly reflects its actual cost - including its social and environmental impact. Juli shares her work on such a data solution that helps to tackle this issue,

• Johnny Harris made another awesome video. This time, he talks about the "Cold War" between the US and China regarding microchip production. In 30 minutes, you will understand this crucial situation around us briefly.

• If you are in Budapest, check out the Budapest International Documentary Festival this week. You can also meet me there as a moderator tonight at 20:30 at the movie "Where Are We Headed" and on Friday at 15:45 at the movie "Paying a Visit to Fortuna."

• If you want to get smarter every day in various fields of interest, sign up to Refind and let the algorithm send you 5 valuable links every day, curated from 10k+ sources.

Newsletters I Read Every Week

• Young Money - Jack writes inspirational & insightful posts on finance, career, and life. I learned a lot from his work, which was also a great motivation for me to start my own newsletter. 10/10 recommended!

• International Intrigue - A valuable newsletter on diplomacy & geopolitics delivered every weekday. Rather read this than all those shitty clickbait articles on mainstream media.

• Exec Sum - A daily newsletter on the major stories from the financial world. It's fun, entertaining, and informative. Better than those finance outlets with shitloads of ads.

• Snail Mail by Slow Growth - a weekly newsletter delivered every Monday by Matt D'Avella's team with great motivational content on productivity. It's not the usual productivity bullshit that you find everywhere else.

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